Lesson # 1.....Dont take Daddy to swim lessons!

Oh my gosh! This was day number 1 of KCs week long swim lessons and I was so worried how it was going to go for KC and me I didnt even think about Hubby coming. He decided yesterday he was going to come this morning and lord help I wish he wouldve just stayed home. Talking about a Debbie Downer! He immediately starts off with the negative comments "Hes to young for this", "I cant believe youre making him do this" "He cant even talk, hows he gonna understand to kick", "This is so stupid", "This is so dumb ", "Youre so mean", "Hes not old enough for this yet", "Hes cryin because your mean", etc. etc. etc. It is mean and cruel, but the lesson is only 45mins. and this same family has been teaching kids to swim for over 30 years in our community, so they know what they are doing obviously. KC was the youngest in his class and he was fine until the other kids started bawling, then he joined the party. He didnt cry the whole time, and he sat on the edge of the pool and waited his turn without getting up once. It was hard to watch and atleast twice I covered my eyes so I didnt have to look. Ms. Katie, one of his teachers said he did very good for being so young, and that on the count of 3 he held his breath every time. She also said by Wednesday the tears would be gone. Lets see if thats holds true or not. Needless to say, Hubby is not coming back until Friday if he comes back at all. BooHoo! Depending of how he does this week, we may come back next week too. I say we but what I really mean is I, the mean old Mama will force that innocent lil boy to come back to those dreadful swimming lessons.

My camera batteries were dead this morning to, so I didnt get any pictures from today. Not that I wanted any, it was pretty pitiful! Well try again tomorrow.

Happy Fathers Day!

Happy Fathers Day to all the great Dads out there!

Especially my Hubby, Dad, Pop, and my FIL! Love you guys!

You big fat dummy!

People never cease to amaze me. I mean Im no rocket scientist, Ive said and done some pretty stupid things in my life but some people are so dumb really they should have to wear a card around their necks with their IQ printed on it.

Take this woman for example: MORON

Come on! Who falls asleep while get a tattoo on your freakin face! I will try to remember to not fall asleep while getting my next tattoo.

Day 2, in the books and swim lessons for my little fish

KCs second day of school was today and he had another very good day. His teacher says he is just the sweetest boy ever, and that he is a good sharer and seems to be such a happy baby. Im sure they just tell everyone that to make them feel better, but it is nice to hear anyways. Both times I picked him up he was happy and seemed to be in a good mood. Im able to come in and peek in on him without him seeing me and he looked like he was enjoying himself so this seems to be going good. Next week he has swim lessons, and Im battling this one. Living in Florida we are always near a body of water in the summertime so water safety is important, right? Well a few family members think its cruel and mean. I learned to swim from the same ladies where Im taking KC, and so did KAS so it cant be that bad. My friend took her son last week and she said he can hold his breath and kicks for the wall in the pool. The point of the lessons is to teach them how to hold their breath, flip over to their backs, and also kick to the wall. My friend actually didnt take her son, she made her Mom do it she didnt go to a lesson until the fourth and fifth day. I have started to second guess myself and I think maybe he is to young and maybe it is mean. Do I go? Do I make Gigi or Nan take him so I dont have to see my baby cry? Or do I just suck it up and do this thing, its only 1 hour a day for a week. I have seen some pictures and some of those kiddos are pretty pitiful! I hope its not to bad, the what ifs are really getting to me though.

Im leaving you with a picture from my friends sons swim class

Poor babies! Is that mean or what!

20 years is a long time

Twenty years ago today, I was a 9 year old girl to young to understand, but old enough to know the meaning. Twenty years is a long time to be without your Dad, long enough to question whether he was really here at all. Twenty years ago I remembered his smile, his laugh, his voice, but today its hard to remember the details except for photos. Twenty years is a long time to hang on to memories, and a long time to let some of them go. Twenty years ago, my life changed forever even though I didnt want it to. Twenty years ago etched a date in my mind that I will never forget as long as I live. Twenty years ago I became a statistic. Twenty years ago I was forced to grow up beyond my years and try to grasp why God would do this to me? Twenty years ago I knew that my Dad went to Heaven after he came to me in a dream to tell me he was sorry to leave me so soon, and that he was ok, and one day he would see me again. Twenty years ago my Dad was 29, and had his whole life ahead of him. Twenty years ago seems like such a long time.

Today I am the woman I am because of what I went through. Today, I know the battles I endured not having that man in my life. Today I accept that my life will always be different. Today I wonder what he would think of my life, and what he would think of his only grandson. Today I am sad because my son will never know my Dad. Today I wish I could have one last hug. Today I want it all to be a dream. Today I am 29, and I have my whole life ahead of me. Today I miss him just as much as I did then.

ok Im really back this time....I swear

KC, Mom, & I left Wednesday night for a family reunion in Aliceville, Alabama. We went there back in March, but this time we got to see about 200 family members from all over. I also volunteered to coordinate a family cookbook, wait I volunteered? I never do stuff like this, what was I thinking? I made a special email for family to send recipes to, and I got over 20 recipes at the reunion already! This should be a fun project, and I have a entire year to work on it so thats a plus. Feel free to give me your favorite recipes also. This was KCs first reunion and it was so neat taking my son to a place I in a sense grew up. We then rushed back Sunday so Mom could be at work Monday, we got home after 2am and let me tell you it was a long car ride. My Mom is not a good traveler and after about the 9th hour we decided it would be best to not speak. Im used to it so its just better that way. I love my Mom to pieces but shes set in her ways. Thank goodness for dvds because poor KC wouldnt have made it otherwise, he watched Oswald, Clifford, Wonder Pets, and Fraggle Rock and he was out by 9:30pm and we were only past Tallahassee. Monday was spent cleaning up my disaster of a house my Hubby left me, doing laundry, and sleeping!

Today, well today KC started preschool! Im a little freaked out but not to bad, hes only going 2 half days a week from 8-12. I dont have alot of friends with younger kids, so I thought it would be go for him to socialize with other kids his age and learn new things. I struggled to find the right place for him for a few months because its hard leaving him with someone I have no clue about. I found a place close where I actually knew some of the people working their from high school and it made me feel at ease. KC is not a morning person (he takes after his mama I think) so I thought waking him up would be a process but he was fine. I also thought being a so called mamas boy he would not want to stay, but I was wrong on that too. He went right in, came back and gave me a smooch and said bye bye, bye bye. Wow! Take that mama! I came back to pick him up and they said he did so good! They said he follows directions and listens so well already, and I must say it made me feel pretty darn good. I hope Thursday goes just as smooth, but I think hes really going to adjust ok.

It my now extra free 8 hours a week I will be joining a gym, getting a personal trainer, and signing up for some sort of school. Im thinking of getting a surgical tech certificate or something medical where I can work in the hospital. I have always been a creature of the night, so Id really like to work night shift so my daily schedule doesnt change to much. Im just thinking about all this, I havent made any decisions yet but I know I want to do something.

Hubbys treatments having been ok, hes done 3, so now 3 to go. Last week they postponed it a week becuase they were thinking he was starting a infection becuase of some burning he had so hes back on for this Friday. In the last month we have learned of 3 other family members and friends who are also battling various cancers. Our close friend whose in his late 50's discovered he has stage 4 bone cancer in his jaw, and also several lymphnodes. He is also going to Moffitt, and he may be starting chemo and radiation first, or may have surgery first to remove his jawbone and lymphnodes. While at Hubbys treatment, I saw a family friend who used to work for my grandparents business and he has stage 3 colon cancer. He was there getting his chemo treatments and he has 6-8 weeks of that and he will then have surgery to remove part of his colon. And also while in AL one of my Pops cousins, (my 4th or 5th cousin) recently had gastric bypass and lost alot of weight, and discovered he had enlarged lypmhnodes so went to get it checked and he was told he had cancer and he is getting treatment at a cancer center in Auburn. Its just astounding to knew first hand so many people going through this disease. Its really not fair! Please say a pray for those you know, and may not know dealing with cancer.

Thanks for sticking around! :-)


Here is KCs first day today

KC & my SILs nephew

KC & Mrs Donna

Im baaaaaack!

Not fully functional yet, but alot better off than I was this time yesterday.
I will be updating this week!